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24 Aug 2011

This Must Be What Heaven’s Like.

Written by sally @ 7:48 am — Section: sally

If you were the type to start Christmas shopping now, and your mother had said that she wanted a smallish purse for Christmas, and you were at Steinmart and found a Coach bag that was marked down to $59.95 (from $198!) AND you had a 40% off clearance coupon, would the appearance of two inch-long pink ink marks on the back deter you from making this purchase? It did not deter me, but I can’t decide if the ink marks (which the internet said might come off) will ruin it or if getting a Coach bag for 82% off will make my mother proud.

This morning I was looking for a piece of paper in the guest room and all I could find was a list from 1997 of terrible lines from an Ann Jillian movie I was watching on Lifetime:

“Promise me I’ll always be touching you.”
“This must be what heaven’s like.”
“I’ve dreamed of this moment.”
“Hold me. Put your arms around me.”

I read this list every few years and the effect is the same: first, gross. Second, is it possible there are people who think this is romantic? I just searched for it on imdb and am pretty sure this is it: The Care and Handling of Roses. I recommend the review called “Unintentional Laughs Aplenty”:

Never have I seen so much hokey over-acting crammed into one small movie. Corny melodrama that had me laughing until I cried. I guess the viewer was supposed to feel the underlying sexual tension between Lee Horsley and Ann Jillian, rooting for their love to prevail, but they were both so utterly unappealing and unattractive I didn’t care what happened to them. Every over used soap-opera gag is used to the hilt in this thing: Tearfully running in the rain, forbidden phone calls, desperate, longing gazes, loads of cheesy dialog–yuck. I will say, however, I did enjoy this movie–AS A COMEDY!

Somehow I feel validated for keeping this piece of paper for 14 years.

One Response to “This Must Be What Heaven’s Like.”

  1. -R- said:

    I would think the bag would still be nice, despite the pink marks, so I say it’s a good buy.