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25 May 2006

Spoiled Spoilers!

Written by sally @ 9:23 am — Section: sally

Here’s my recap of last night’s Lost and American Idol! With lots of ellipses and exclamation points!

Locke and Eko battle over the button…and end their feud by swaying back and forth and singing a Burt Bacharach medley!

Michael takes Jack, Kate, Sawyer, Elliott Yamin, and Hurley into the Others’ trap…only to break down when he hears the sweet stylings of Mary J. Blige!

Desmond’s past is revealed…by Clay Aiken’s new wig!

We tremble with anticipation as we wait to see who America loves more…Taylor Hicks or Walt!

Kate kills a guy…who turns out to be Meat Loaf!

Sawyer is still hot…as is Prince!

I think this explains it all.

7 Responses to “Spoiled Spoilers!”

  1. Lucy said:

    I only watched the first 45 or so minutes of American Idol, but WHAT THE HELL HAS HAPPENED TO MEATLOAF? Not that he was that great before, but I thought he might die right there on the stage!

    And I was bored by the first half of Lost and utterly confused by the last 5 minutes.

  2. bulb said:

    “Taylor Hicks or Walt!”

    Funny Funny Stuff; reminds me of SNL’s AI parody, which was a series of fake ads interjected with Seacrest banter always ending “and we’ll find out right after this break . . . .” 10–12 minutes later they changed skits and you hadn’t seen a single result; Har Har!

  3. The Diplomat said:

    I caught the last 15 or so minutes of AI. I came in during the diane warwick thing. Thanks God I didn’t see more. All I have to say is that seeing Prince perform before some Gawdawful duet of the two Idols really put things into friggin perspective. What did the Times call AI this morning, “‘Idol’ is a monster-size celebration of mediocrity that, astonishingly, has not lost its hold on viewers even in its fifth season.”

    Everyone hates Tiffani. Poor child. Dave shoulda been there.

  4. SALLY said:

    I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT TOP CHEF WTF.

  5. Lucy said:

    Loraine Bracco was totally interesting as a guest judge. “I didn’t really feel like I wanted to lick my plate after that course, and that made me sad.”

  6. The Diplomat said:

    all the chefs are total drunks. it’s awesome. Dave was realing around the kitchen while cooking for Tiff after having gay-nigh-vegas-style with Steven. Harold’s sneaking shots of saphire, and after winning, when asked for his thoughts, exclaims, “I need a cocktail!” TWICE!

    Harold is a hero.

  7. Jaxxie said:

    YAY FOR HAROLD!!!

    I was REALLY surprised by the consistency of Tiffani’s bitchiness all the way to the end. I was expecting a Santo-esque plot twist revealing her to be completely misunderstood (or misrepresented by the producers.)

    I wonder if they thought they were going to play up some redeeming traits and realized too late that she had none. Or if the Bravo producers have just run out of steam and couldn’t think of any way to make the ending less predictable.

    I love, love, love that the guys sabotaged her by getting drunk.