A BRIEF YES/NO QUIZ

1. On Thanksgiving, while playing Apples to Apples with your 10-year old cousin and 87-year old grandmother, did you find yourself getting extremely competitive with both of them?

Yes.
No.

2. When your grandmother was trying to choose a card to match with the word sexy, did you giggle a lot?

Yes.
No.

3. Did you try to argue with a 10-year old that spontaneous combustion was much, much, MUCH more brilliant than a rainbow and that thus, you should’ve won that round?

Yes.
No.

4. During Thanksgiving dinner, hours after the game, did you keep bringing it up?

Yes.
No.

5. Did this make you feel bad in retrospect?

Not really.

I READ A BOOK AND WATCHED NO TV

It was The Chaperone. It wasn’t very good. Hey, this book is about silent film star Louise Brooks as a teenager! Wait wait no, it’s about an orphan named Clara whose husband is kinda weird but then she takes up with this janitor and wait what about Louise Brooks again dammit I accidentally read the whole thing.

In tv news, the absence of Couples Therapy is a dark hole in my heart. And no more Upstairs, Downstairs, and Downton Abbey doesn’t start until January, and I have eleventy billion episodes of Treme to watch but I don’t have the emotional energy to do so. I was thinking about watching an episode, but then I read the description and it said “Steve Zahn acts wacky, bugs his eyes out, sings/raps in an embarrassing way” and I decided not to.

AWKWARD TOWN

There is one particular Kroger that has a few tiny buggies that are perfect for a four-year old to push around the store calmly and without running down the aisles or launching the buggy down the aisle only to crash into a macaroni and cheese display, so we have been going there, even though the whole time I am hunched over the cart trying to get Spike to point it in the right direction. So the other day we were in the milk area, and Spike was telling an impassioned story about how wouldn’t it be funny if all the milk fell out of the cases and poured on our heads, and my back hurt from hunching, so when this lady said, “Oh, what a great helper you have!” I said something about haha, yes, this is fantastic, hunching over like this and becoming disfigured, ha ha. Then I looked at her and she had obviously been in an accident and had a cane in her buggy. (Click here.)