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18 Oct 2007

Open Letters to Those Who Have Offended Me.

Written by sally @ 1:49 pm — Section: sally

Dear Lady Who Got in Her Car at the Pizza Shack, Shifted into Reverse, and Then Just Sat There,

If you were going to sit there, maybe you shouldn’t have put your car in reverse. Those little white tail lights indicated to me that I wasn’t going to have to park down the street in the rain.


Dear Man in Car Who Made a Big Show of Overswerving to Get Around Me and then Honked While I Was Waiting for the Lady Who Got in Her Car at the Pizza Shack, Shifted Into Reverse, and Then Just Sat There,

I was totally out of your lane. Also, nobody thinks you’re cool.

Get a life,

Dear Nurse Who Left a Fresh Gown on the Examination Table After Replacing the Protective Germ-Barrier Paper Thingie,

Thanks for leaving that gown on the table! Usually when nurses leave those out, it’s code for “hey patient, get naked and put this on.” Oh, but get this, I didn’t need to get naked. So when the doctor came in, I looked like a nut. Thanks!!

No really, thanks!!!!

Dear Person Who Called Today and Asked What It Means When Your Computer Says to Shut it Down So That It Can Download Some Updates,

It means you’re supposed to shut the computer down so it can download some updates.

I hate you,

2 Responses to “Open Letters to Those Who Have Offended Me.”

  1. poobou said:

    Those first two letters sound like every trip to Costco that I have ever made in my life. Their parking lot is its own little concentric circle of hell, I tell you.

    One perk of pregnancy laziness: you have total permission to ask the nurse if you really HAVE to get undressed (because ugh, unhooking and rehooking a bra? And pulling pants all the way off and all the way on again? So tiring!). That might remind the semi-incompetent nurse that oh yeah, you don’t actually have to get naked, and spare you from looking like a nut. Although I’ll bet your doctor has seen crazier things.

  2. liz said:

    People call you about their computers? Do they call you about proper cooking times for turkeys and what to do about their clogged drains? I didn’t realize the extent of crazy you must deal with daily.