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16 Sep 2019

Kellogg’s is Behind This.

Written by sally @ 7:52 am — Section: sally

I am not a good pancake or waffle maker, but the other day I thought I’d try using the wafflemaker that I used once and then shoved in the back of the cabinet. I’d bought some gluten free pancake mix and announced to Spike that I was going to make waffles.

–MAKE waffles? WHY?
–Because your uncle gave us a wafflemaker and I’ve only used it once.
–Why not just make an Eggo?

Problem the first: the wafflemaker was in the back of the cabinet. It’s a bottom corner cabinet, so I basically had to take everything out. Are you missing any water bottles or random jars? It’s because I have apparently stolen them from your house and thrown them willy-nilly into this bottom corner cabinet. Related: does anyone need any water bottles or random jars? I took everything out of the cabinet and sorted it into toss/keep, but I have a small kitchen and now the countertops were completely covered in stuff. I finally got to the wafflemaker, but I had to process all the extra stuff before I could move on to waffling.

Problem the second: I read the back of the bag and got all my ingredients out. I dumped the bag of pancake mix into the bowl and dumped the other stuff in. Then I noticed it said, “Add 1 1/2 cups of pancake mix.” Not the whole bag. Not the whole, much more than 1 1/2 cups of mix bag. Huh. Ok. FINE. I threw all that away.

Problem the third: I have gluten free flour and a pancake/waffle recipe. The universe was probably trying to tell me that I don’t need to buy a MIX for something as easy as PANCAKES. I was CONFIDENT. I HAD this. And then I mixed up the baking soda and baking powder. That’s ok, I thought. I am not going to worry about that. Maybe they’ll be flat or super fat or whatever happens when you use the opposite one of whichever one I was supposed to use! I cannot be stopped! Waffles, here I come! Then I tried to crack one of the two required eggs. And the eggs were frozen. We also experienced pickles frozen in pickle juice the other day, so I shouldn’t have been totally surprised, but the AUDACITY of the eggs to be frozen after all my trials really stopped me in my tracks.

I know a sign from the universe when I see one (maybe it takes me a minute, but I get there eventually). I tossed everything in the trash and asked Spike how many Eggos he wanted.

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