11 Dec 2006
Cavities.
Sometimes I wonder about Martha Stewart. I made these bar cookies yesterday, and while they are beautiful and tasty, they are also so sweet you can feel your teeth crying and rotting before you even take a bite. I cut them into about 24 manageable pieces — Martha claims this recipe makes 16. Well, 16 if you have a crush on your dentist and want to have a reason to go visit him.

Also, they have the worst name in the world: Rocky Ledge Bars. Rocky Ledge? I don’t want to eat a Rocky Ledge! I don’t even know what a Rocky Ledge is! I have renamed these. . . drum roll please. . .Cavities.
In other news, you will be pleased to know that the talent show is TOTALLY ON. The fun times party committee (of which I am NOT a member) met, and here is the roster so far:
1. singing
2. singing
3. poem reading
4. lip synching to Christmas carols
5. singing in native language and playing an instrument*
6. performing a praise dance
Is this going to be awesome, or what?
*I asked what the instrument was. Apparently no one had ever heard of it.
December 11th, 2006 at 11:41 am
That list would definitely be enhanced by some fitted sheet folding. I made some cavities of my own this weekend with Snickers fudge. Freakin’ delicious.
http://desertculinary.blogspot.com/2005/05/snickers-fudge.html
December 11th, 2006 at 11:56 am
Oh, dear lord. That looks tooth-rottingly good. Did they turn out like they were supposed to?
December 11th, 2006 at 1:37 pm
A praise dance? Oh lord.
December 11th, 2006 at 3:12 pm
WAIT. WAIT. PRAISE DANCING IS NOT A TALENT!
It is for the baby Jesus!
NOT FOR YOUR CO-WORKERS
December 11th, 2006 at 4:45 pm
i can’t decide whether, if given the chance to see just one, i’d rather see carols be lip-synched or women in jumpsuits doing the salome to carmen and michael w. smith.
you are the luckiest woman on earth.
December 11th, 2006 at 5:00 pm
Lip synching is a talent? Really?
I’m not exactly sure what a praise dance is, but it sounds awesomely horrendous.
December 11th, 2006 at 5:54 pm
We are totally rigging up a “1980-styled, local news team investigative journalism division, undercover camera in an extremely large duffle bag, with a round hole cut in one end, and conspicuously carried by the handles, as if they are shoulder straps” tonight to document this event.
And, by the way, your praise dance is awesome. Everyone is going to love it.
December 11th, 2006 at 6:32 pm
Mine didn’t cut as fabulously as those pictured, but they taste ridiculously good. I recommend them.
December 11th, 2006 at 7:20 pm
I came to work today and was surprised to see someone had given me cavities (divinity, pralines, fudge, and lemon squares). I’ve been sharing the divinity, pralines, and fudge with a co-worker this evening.
There are so many lemon squares that they’ll be my dessert dish for my office’s party in two days. Oh, and apropos to this message, I also have a dental appointment tomorrow morning. Hopefully, the dentist will find no cavities.
December 11th, 2006 at 8:41 pm
You know that I used to mime to praise music, but did you know that I also did several praise dances back in the old days? Ho yes! Good call on the praise dance music choices Vendela, as I definitely danced to Carmen, and maybe to Michael W. Smith. MWS wasn’t as rockin’ as Carmen, so it’s more likely that I just sang one of his songs in front of the youth group. With the CD. With his voice.
Can you maybe videotape the show and invite all of your readers over to watch it for a special no-holds-barred (did I spell that correctly?) Christmas party??
December 11th, 2006 at 11:11 pm
rocky ledge recipe, pls.
December 12th, 2006 at 7:23 am
Here’s the recipe, but the version I have says butterscotch chips, not toffee chips (I guess they’re easier to find — also, I just used chocolate chips instead of chopped chocolate). And the insanity gets more insane: she says you get 15 of these. Seriously, you could kill a person by feeding them a large piece. I brought these to work and found several fillings in the stacks.
December 12th, 2006 at 12:22 pm
Mix,
Please tell me more about your Carmen dances. Please, when next we meet, join me in a performance of “The Champion.” And then let’s have an argument over when Carmen jumped the shark: “Some O Dat” or “Radically Saved.”
Yours,
PF
December 12th, 2006 at 12:49 pm
Am I showing my ignorance by saying that I had to Google “praise dance” to find out what it was. (It was pretty much what I thought it would be.)
December 12th, 2006 at 1:02 pm
You are only showing that you are not originally from the bible belt.
December 12th, 2006 at 1:55 pm
I thought a praise dance was something Native American. I was intrigued!
Guess not?
December 12th, 2006 at 6:35 pm
Prof., I will not disappoint. I mean it. Our next meeting will be very embarrassing for me. You will love it!