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2 Dec 2004

Annoyances: II.

Written by sally @ 2:08 pm — Section: sally

Earlier in the day, you are deep in thought, totally focused on your work. While your “work” is actually a “crossword puzzle,” this is no matter, as you scribble and erase your incorrect, dumbass puzzle answers as if you are working on a cure for cancer.

In between potential answers, you rest your pencil on the space between your nose and mouth. Sometimes you tap your forehead with it.

After you complete your puzzle, you make the rounds to say hello to people. You go to lunch, visit a store, and then go to a meeting where you are forced to participate in the “good news” section of the meeting (this is where people announce that they have new grandchildren, etc) but only because of the way the speaker asked for good news:

Does anyone have any other good news to report?

You hesitate before deciding that to refrain would be to imply that your news is, in fact, bad news, then say, um, I got married.

People congratulate you after the meeting.

Then you go to the bathroom, and as you look in the mirror as you are washing your hands, you discover that there is eraser dust all over your face. There is some on your forehead, sure, and that is weird and all, but most upsetting is the fact that you have a veritable moustache of eraser dust above your lip.


3 Responses to “Annoyances: II.”

  1. sam said:

    Moustaches, even real ones, are dirty. “Moustache” is a filthy, filthy word. Just look at it. You cannot pronounce the word without a bit of a lip-curl, a sneer, a wrinkling of the nose. I cannot imagine a moustache without imagining one of the greasy, pencil-thin, cheap-suit-wearing, child-molesting variety. Actually, I can — Tom Selleck. Shorts with a 2 inch inseam.

    I rest my case.

  2. Sally said:

    The best gynecologist at the health center at MSU has a poster of Tom Selleck above the examination table so you have something to look at. Hi-larious.

    My dad has had a moustache for 35 years, but only recently has it gone from Tom Selleck-style to the droopy Wild West variety. Gross.

  3. ceo said:

    Dirty is as dirty does, baby.