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24 Mar 2017

Mad About Germs.

Written by sally @ 6:58 am — Section: sally

A few weeks ago I mentioned that I was on Bumble. I am no longer on Bumble. I encountered my ex-husband’s profile and now I am Done with Bumble. (Note: it was a really good profile! I’m proud of him.)

In related news, while I am casually open to the idea of being unsingle again, there are two things that I do actively miss about being coupled: 

  1. I have psoriasis, which is not noteworthy except that one of my recurring spots is on the back of my neck, and I often don’t realize it’s returned until I’ve been walking around with a scaly neck patch for a month. One responsibility of a partner is to alert me to the appearance of said scales.
  2. Bragging about a work victory. Friends are awesome, but I don’t want to say I DID THIS THING AND I AM SO PROUD OF MYSELF! to anyone but someone who has indicated he finds this interesting and not annoyingly braggy. (I found out about a work something this morning that is Huge and do not think any friends want an early morning text about my victory.)

I’ve started watching Mad About You reruns in the morning. I used to love this show, and rewatching reveals that this show is actually terrible. First, Paul’s shirt is always tucked in and he never wears a belt. This must be a situation Paul Reiser developed in a workshop, as I don’t recall this being a widespread fashion choice in the 90s. Second, Paul’s masculinity is super fragile and most episodes have to do with Paul having to come to terms with this in some way: he must use bath gel instead of bar soap; they are trying to get pregnant and Jamie wants to take a cool new job–but Paul objects. How will she WORK and also CARE FOR A NON-EXISTING CHILD? It’s fun to watch in a “wow, it keeps getting worse” kind of way.

There was also an episode where Jamie made some pasta and kept taking out pieces of penne from the big bowl and tasting it. No big deal, except then she licked her fingers and went right back in. Things got worse when she made Paul taste it and shoved a piece in his mouth. Licked her fingers. Made Paul taste another. Licked her fingers. Tasted another herself. Lick. Her sister Lisa came over. Shoved a piece in Lisa’s mouth. LICKED HER FINGERS. Germs, Helen Hunt. Have you heard of germs? (She probably figured she and Paul Reiser had shared all the germs available to share as the script calls for them to kiss every 15 seconds.)

Ok bye

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