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19 Sep 2006

Pirates, KFC, Westerns, Hipsters, Etc.

Written by sally @ 09:17 — Section: nuggets

• First off, today is National Talk Like a Pirate Day. Here is a handy pirate talk translator to make the transition easier.

• I have been remembering my dreams a lot lately. The other night I dreamed I was using a Kentucky Fried Chicken bucket as a purse, and last night I dreamed that Larry “streamlined” my bathroom by removing the sink and placing the toilet tank where the sink used to be. And then he put the scales on the wall. This morning when I told him about it, he said, well, if you knew what I know about what’s about to happen with gravity, you’d put the scales on the wall, too.

• Last night Vendela and I attended our first short story class. I am hestitant to just full-throttle report everything stupid that was said, because I grow tired of hipster cynicism, even my own. But can I tell you just one deliciously hilarious sentence that was uttered during class last night? (I am limiting myself to one because I am trying really hard not to ruin the class completely for myself. I think it will be sort of fun, if I can get over my very real hunch that I am in the wrong place.) Ok, here it is:

Yeah, and I’ve published some westerns in Canada.

However, if next week’s class is like this one, all bets are off and I am going to report everything funny I heard. Like when that one guy said, introducing himself, “I’m a family man, and I like to write teenage adventures.”

• Oh, and speaking of hipster cynicism, read this article.

8 Responses to “Pirates, KFC, Westerns, Hipsters, Etc.”

  1. RD said:

    My wife briefly dated one of the guys behind Talk Like a Pirate Day. That’s fairly embarassing.

  2. herman rarebell said:

    larry gave me a pamphlet on “intelligent falling” the other day.

  3. poobou said:

    I’m sure that it isn’t how the statement was intended, but I must say that I am more than a little creeped out by the “teenage adventure” guy.

  4. mix said:

    Strange. I had a house-dream last night too. But the dream wasn’t about my house. It was about this cool, big duplex, and we were trying to choose which side to live on. I think there was a lot of clutter in this duplex, though, so it could’ve used a dose of Larry’s streamlining.

    I’m hoping that the family man in your class will write a cautionary tale about teenagers who try to have sex (that’s the adventure part) and then about their subsequent repentances and adventurous returns to the good side.

  5. larry ferrari said:

    Seriously, if you knew what I know about gravity and what the Bush and Melton administrations are trying to do to it…you would be putting scales, chairs, floor lamps, and fax machines up on the wall TO-nite.

  6. beth said:

    HAH! I’m still giggling about the KFC purse-bucket. Now the gravity talk is pushing me over the edge.

  7. sally said:

    The KFC bucket purse was really quite roomy, only I had to keep dumping out all the tortilla chips that kept accumulating in it. The no handle thing was sort of getting me down as well.

  8. Polly said:

    dhid he say if they were sexy adventures?