27 Feb 2010

Happiness Is…

Written by sally @ 9:38 am — Section: sally

1. A baby successfully napping in a hotel room after a long battle.
2. Discovering one of your acquaintance’s sons has quit community college to “hang chickens” at a poultry plant.
3. That’s hang as in kill.
4. Chicken killer!
5. Did I mention we’re in a tiny, albeit charming, hotel room in New Orleans? Tiny and charming are awesome if you are travelling without a grumpy child in need of a nap, but sucky if there’s no closet/alcove to stash the pack and play.
6. I’m actually not complaining, as I am laying in bed drinking a Coke and eating a cherry
danish at the moment.

20 Feb 2010

To Her Front.

Written by sally @ 7:58 pm — Section: sally

“…about a year later, Mike Todd took off in a private plan in a rainstorm, and the following morning Elizabeth [Taylor] was a widow. Well, naturally, my father flew to Elizabeth’s side, gradually making his way to her front. He first dried her eyes with his handkerchief, then he consoled her with flowers, and he ultimately consoled her with his penis. Now this made marriage to my mother awkward, so he was gone within the week.”

–Carrie Fisher, Wishful Drinking

This is my second favorite part. My favorite part is the photo family tree.

17 Feb 2010

Little Bullet, Big Head.

Written by sally @ 9:16 am — Section: sally

I was just trying to think of what Mary Jo Buttafuoco’s autobiography was called, and said this to my coworker (who did not know about Amy Fisher/Joey Buttafuoco/Mary Jo Buttafuoco):

It’s something like, Yo, My Head Is Too Big for a Bullet. Or Hey, You Shot Me In the Head But It Bounced Off, So I’m Ok. Or maybe Little Bullet, Big Head. Something like that.

Then I checked, and the actual title is: Getting It Through My Thick Skull.

15 Feb 2010

The Knitter’s Lament.

Written by sally @ 8:22 pm — Section: sally

So it turns out that I’m kind of a crap knitter. I figured I would be, as I have very poor hand-eye coordination. (I am horrible at all video games, although I am not total crap at pinball. Because what’s sweeping the nation, much like baby fish mouth? PINBALL IN 2010.) I have been plugging along on a crusty scarf that is only getting crustier as I manhandle it, and it brings me no joy: only reminders of how crusty it is. I could blame Vanna White and her shitty, splayed yarn for my troubles, but I know that Vanna and her 2/$3 special are only partly to blame. That being said, I did make some lovely felt flowers today during Spike’s nap. So see, I still have the crafting flu — I just need to find something that doesn’t make me feel like I did growing up when I could not make it past the cherry level in Ms. Pac Man. (In related news, I used to get whipped by a friend’s brother at Super Mario Brothers in high school. He had Down Syndrome.)

I started reading The Foreskin’s Lament by Shalom Auslander, and it turns out I don’t enjoy books like that. I felt like I signed up for “wacky wacky Orthodox insanity” and instead just got the Jewish version of Running with Scissors. Which I did not read. On purpose. However, since I got halfway through Foreskin’s Lament, I am counting that as a completely read book and adding it to my list. Next up: I plan to halfway read The Sisters: The Saga of the Mitford Family by Mary S. Lovell before giving up and just looking at the photos and then putting it back on the shelf.

Anyway.

Here are some tags:
IFLUBIYU
SMRIE (I’ve decided that this person embraces the Cole Porter within her, and that her name is Marie. You know, ‘swonderful, ‘smarvelous, ‘sMarie.)

6 Feb 2010

Lab Results.

Written by sally @ 9:32 pm — Section: sally

If my glasses were submitted to a forensics lab, this is what the results would look like:

Glasses owner:
Uses lots of hairspray and is therefore most likely from Texas. Both lenses are coated.
Recently made lemon glaze, probably for Dorie Greenspan’s lemon poppy seed muffins. Glob found on left lens.
Recently wrestled on the floor with her toddler son, resulting in carpet fibers caught in the left hinge. The toddler was probably slap-happy due to refusing second nap.
Does not clean lenses regularly.

4 Feb 2010

Bigmouth.

Written by sally @ 7:54 pm — Section: sally

Tag:
SWTNESS

Song inspired by seeing this tag:
SWTNESS
SWTNESS
I WS NLY JKG WN I SD ID LK 2 SMSH EVRY 2TH N YR HD

1 Feb 2010

Dinner Report.

Written by sally @ 9:55 am — Section: sally

I made this for dinner and these for dessert yesterday. Both are awesome, although the cookies were definitely easier. That lasagna almost did me in, especially because I was trying to get it on the table in time for babydinner. While I might not make this exact sauce again (seriously, that’s a lot of steps), I will definitely do the part about ricotta + parmesan + egg in the food processor again instead of just glopping hunks of ricotta in my future lasagnas.

Yup, that’s all I got.

Edited to add:
A note about the cookies: as much as I follow recipes, there is always a part of me that thinks I know better, and so when I read “space two inches apart” I thought “nah, I can cram in a few more,” and thus ended up with a cookie sheet filled with one giant interconnected cookie. This is fine, except when I cut them up I apparently made them into squares, and then when a friend came over she thought I had made a bunch of hash browns. Mmm, a tasty dessert treat: the hash brown.

A note about the lasagna: I ate some for lunch today and it was ten times better than it was last night. Which means I will suffer through all the various steps again one day.

Edited again to add:
These additions did not particularly help this post.